|Me:||How are you?|
|Honorable Uhuru:||Am cool? You have received the GOK Unga yet?|
|Me:||Yeah! Its sweeter by the way, hope you didn’t add something…|
|Honorable Uhuru:||What? Who could do that?|
|Honorable Uhuru:||hehe…hehe! No, we didn’t. its Mexico maize. That’s how it tastes!|
|Me:||Oh, okay! (mockingly…) That’s “cool” then…|
|Honorable Uhuru:||Now what up?|
|Me:||There is this thing…|
|Me:||Well, I mean…|
|Honorable Uhuru:||Wait, I still got your vote?|
|Me:||Me: about that, also…|
|Honorable Uhuru:||Honorable Uhuru: (in a sober and serious tone) Wacha mchezo kijana!|
|Me:||Let’s say I wanted to vote you…|
|Me:||Why would I?|
|Honorable Uhuru:||Log in to delivery! delivery.go.ke!|
|Honorable Uhuru:||You will see what we have done there|
|Me:||That’s funny but anyway. The thing I wanted to talk to you about is this thing about votes|
|Honorable Uhuru:||Don’t worry! We got it.|
|Me :||What do you mean?|
|Honorable Uhuru:||We are winning…|
|Me:||You and who?|
|Honorable Uhuru:||Us! You, me, Ruto…|
|Me:||So you expect my vote automatically?|
|Honorable Uhuru:||Absolutely! You are from my tribe!|
|Me:||Wow! and if not?|
|Honorable Uhuru:||Well, that’s unfortunate! And u…|
|Me:||So, tell me… I applied for a transfer in polling station, only…|
|Honorable Uhuru:||You see… you would not have done it earlier that easily!|
|Me:||I meant to say “only to find myself at the same polling station”|
|Honorable Uhuru:||uuh…! What will you do?|
|Me:||I will not vote!|
|Me:||You heard right! Am not going to vote!|
|Honorable Uhuru:||Why? You should be a responsible citizen!|
|Me:||Well, perhaps you should try being a citizen too!|
|Honorable Uhuru:||What? As in, what do you mean?|
|Me:||You should try surviving on one mean per day, using all your money for fare and …|
|Honorable Uhuru:||No Kenyan is living like that! I know my people! We are a strong and healthy nation!|
|Me:||You truly are not Kenyan! You defend incompetency, negligence, corruption by rejecting their existence hence hindering justice!|
|Honorable Uhuru:||That’s the work of the justice department!|
|Me:||Under whose authority?|
|Me:||If part of your government fails, you fail too!|
|Honorable Uhuru:||What can I do? I mean, to change your mind about the vote?|
|Me:||Nothing! I have decided not to travel many miles just to vote then return at the same position!|
|Honorable Uhuru:||I can give you fare… 1 million, what do you say?|
|Me:||I say give every Kenyan the right to pride in their own tribe. Make us all equal. Admit failure to fight corruption and make visible strides to fight tribal discrimination! Bridge the gap between the rich and the poor not by building railways but by empowering that poor guy who created a classroom chopper with a motorbike engine.|
|Honorable Uhuru:||So, are you taking the fare?|
|Me:||Let me think…well, no! not that I don’t need it, but…but I would rather not betray Kenya! I must admit, it feels proud to do this!|
|Honorable Uhuru:||Okay, I will make sure I observe your issues next term in office, any more advice?|
|Me:||Of course, yes! Look at the NASA manifesto! It has almost everything!|
The thing is, I don’t like what my current government is doing. Clearly, nobody does. At the same time, I love what Raila is doing, or can do, or would do, especially being a whistle-blower. But I still will vote for Uhuru! Why, because of this… “One who thrives in disorder may not survive in order”!!! what am personally worried of, or about, is the consequences of the good changes that Raila might bring, or (…because we are not sure yet…) the kind of bad changes that Raila might trigger. One very specific concern is his followers, the so called “children of baba”. For sure, many of them are very good, starting out with my girlfriend, however, there are few of them that talk and insight trouble. Perhaps I would be in the same position had Raila rigged the 2007 election, so I will not entirely blame them. However, I don’t want to personally suffer neither do I want the “children of baba” to suffer. Retaining Uhuru will be good for those that have made peace with corruption and developed adaptation to it, and at the same time, it will give us, the guys across the river, some time to adjust to change, as well as accepting it. Am personally not happy with the economic status of my country since last election, if anything it has deteriorated. Uhuru is doing quite a “fair” work in maintaining the economy. He should have been a leader sometime between 2077 and 2087, not now. At that time, hopefully, the country would have been ready for a fast speed railway, better airports and sea ports. What Kenya need now is equality, education, health and food. I don’t know how or what Uhuru has done to ensure proper medical care other than threatening teachers and doctors. Like come on… for goodness sake…our doctors are the most qualified in the whole of Africa yet you want to import doctors from china? These Chinese are starting to softly colonize our country. Am not trying to claim that we should swear our allegiance to Europe or U.S.A, am saying we need independence. Raila has some very weird international relations, including the land of Hitler, Germany and Russia. Kibaki new the balance… don’t beg, don’t tolerate, and don’t chase away!!! Uhuru is tolerating China, and at this time and season, we should align with any country that is ready to offer nuclear technology, like Iran, countries that help us maintain stronger defense, like Israel. Israel owes us a great deal after former president Moi sold soil to them to captivate horticulture. Now Israel is exporting more horticulture that Kenya. We really are stupid. We have power rations while we are located at the exact equator of the world were are assured of sunshine from January to December, we don’t have jobs yet we don’t have a single nuclear plant. The government is helping a lot in creating jobs through technology by going paperless and putting in place Huduma centers, but it’s still not enough. Water rationing is still a theme when we are surrounded by a sea, and have several lakes. If we can import oil from Nigeria, purify it, and pump it to Kisumu, why can’t we pump clean water from Kisumu to Kisii? Or from Mombasa to northern Kenya? Inadequate to exploit these very fundamental opportunities is what results to companies, big companies laying off its workers while other close down business in Kenya because the people cannot even maintain the economy, we are feeding on the economy, we are being sustained by the economy instead of us sustaining the economy. Am very thankful we had visionary leaders like Kibaki and Michuki. People who have brought change. Had Kibaki not declared that a president can only be elected for a maximum of two terms, am sure some people we know would have insisted to remain in power. That being the case, am more worried of 2027. Am not sure Mr. Ruto will take the seat for a second term. Given history, blood shed might be the next thing we are awaiting…
And here is my proposal, instead of importing oil, why can’t we dig out our own? Instead of building railways, why can’t we maintain and build more and better roads? Instead is teachers and doctors striking now and then, why can’t we just give them what they want, exactly the way they want it? Because clearly, we don’t expect a doctor to be contented when he/she can’t afford his own services. A doctor works at an “A Level” hospital but goes to a “C Level” hospital when he/she is ill. A teacher can’t pay school fees for his six children. What is wrong with our common sense? Teaching and medicine used to be king careers, but not anymore. Well, amidst the thickness of confusion, Matiangi appears, to make education “great again”. And we can make education great again! Students who score a straight “A” are the genius, smart, and hard-working ones. Processing a lack in one the three qualities should put you in either “A-” or below. And where did arts and craft go? What about music? And where did they take drama and acting? I can’t remember anyone telling me that they did home-science. No wonder we have problems everywhere even at homes. Equality is not substitution, so am not saying women are equal to men! Go to heaven and back, even go to hell, men can never, and will never be equal to women, period!!! Unless women are willing to participate in the men races at Olympics, unless women are ready be make up more population of the prisoners, unless women are ready…anyway, the point is, men and women are both humans who have the same need, wants and rights, but women are better! Better at cooking, better at making homes, better at emotional judgement, better at all aspects peace-making, and better at installing hard-work and discipline in the minds of a generation…but when it comes to acts that need moderation, acts that require logical judgement, men fair!
In conclusion, I am asking all people to play their part in building Kenya, if you are a teacher, do it well. If you are a farmer, do it better. If you are a shop keeper, promote peace when buyers come. If you are sales person, tell your clients the truth about what you are selling. If you are in government, nature local talent and exploit locally available opportunities. If you are a leader make peaceful and sane decisions. If you are a dad, be a better father! And if you are a mom, be a role model!
How does it feel to always wish and never hope?
Why does it kill you that which heals me?
Why dislike what I like because I hate what you love?
Tribalism is simply cannibalism;
Sweet person from my tongue is a spit from your mouth;
A brother for a brother is an eye for an eye;
Service to humanity is service to self;
Selfishness is simply tribalism;
Safaricom is Kenya’s best mobile service provider…but they suck, they are disgusting, they exploit, the only care about their profits, and their customer care line is always busy…ever busy!!
I recently bought their data bundles at 10/= Kenya shilling for 10 MB and 10 SMS. That sounds fair to me as well to everyone since I only wanted to check my email! And before I could finish opening the last email, a message from Safaricom came, “Your Daily Data Bundle balance is below 2.00 MB. Dial *544# to purchase or Okoa Internet bundle.” And then I decided to open my twitter account and after like 1.7 minutes, they sent me a USSD message telling me that I have an option browsing at 0.45 cents per MB. I immediately opened my calculator and started clicking…0.45*20=9…so I can use 20 MB for only 9 bob? Well then I bought nine shillings from my M-Pesa account and started browsing immediately BUT after I first checked how many data bundles I have used since I bought my phone…after like 2 or 3 minutes, another USSD message pops up this time saying I have a remainder of 1 bob. And I thought to myself, maybe something is synchronizing or updating on the background without my knowledge…but the data count should still count those data bundles, eeh? So let me check by how much did the count increase by. To my surprise, believe it or not, I had only used 2 MB extra! So like they only give 10% of what they promise.
Someone should create something better than M-Pesa and we’ll all swim away from Safaricom…they didn’t even create it! They just copyrighted a student’s idea, and it became theirs… According to filtered rumours that reached to my ears, the original owner of the idea was given ground $50,000 while Safaricom earns approximately $125,000 from the implementation of the idea, DAILY!!!